Labels

That was the message that I got from mass tonight. Labels are a part of our encounter with Christ and with one another. Peter wanted to label his encounter on top of the mountain. What is the purpose of such labels though? Where do labels fit in our lives today? How does a label add or diminish our relationships with others?

I think I have always been a proponent of labels, there is a level of comfort that comes from having a label attached to life. I remember shortly after my divorce, a priest that I had known my entire life growing up approached me and we began to visit. Our conversation went like this:

“So, how is your family?”
“Fine, all of us kids are grown.”
“Now you are divorced, right?”
…long, awkward pause… “Yes.”
“You weren’t even married a year, correct?”
“Yes, that’s right.”

I remember being so furious, disappointed, angry and well, frankly, pissed off. As I look back on this encounter as the years go by, I wouldn’t say that I am grateful, but rather that I am aware of how the benefit of being labeled has helped me to be real about my life today. There are people that live for the ambiguity of life, what it means to them, and how they are able to interact with others in this realm of ambiguity. I, for the most part am not able to function in ambiguity- but I have to trust that there is a reason for such ambiguity. In the times of solace after my divorce, I am able to relate to ambiguity, to the need to un-define, not put strictures and trappings around my living. It is when I am un-trusting that I find myself burgeoning with the need to label- to affix labels to all points and parts of my life and to place my labels on others. Rather than just noting that I am scared, angry, frustrated, or some other emotion- my reaction is place a label on the situation.

I am interested to know how you avoid labels.